You dream of big, deep, earth-quaking change.
What the F am I even afraid of at this point?
Otherwise, you wouldn’t have found me. Change is my favorite! (Said in Buddy the Elf voice).
So what’s the change I’m thinking of making? What’s my new big, hairy, audacious goal to chase after now that I am spending more time on DestinyArchitecture and the hunger is back — the hunger needs to be fed!?!
I want to sell all my crap and go RV’ing around North America.
There, I said it. Buckle up. This could get really GOOD from here on out.
This is something I’ve dreamed about for a long time. Lately in life though, I’ve been bumming. I thought I was living in alignment for the past two months. Birthed from this new feeling was my free ebook, Time To Align, in which I talk about my number one life value — FREEDOM. Except lately, I haven’t felt in alignment with my desire to be really free and it’s been pissing me off.
I thought I’d come up with MORE freedom since July. In July, I quit my social work job because I got really sick. My immune system was so shot, we thought I’d come down with mono — again. My body was just DONE. I decided to leave the recovery center & jail where I was working to give my immune system a rest. I needed to stop being around the indigent population and I had an opening to do what I’ve always loved — morning radio. And again, I’d have a job that didn’t take up my entire schedule. So I still had time freedom, freedom to better my health, to keep spending even MORE time on my business now because I’d be working LESS THAN 40 hours a week now for other people… SO MUCH FREEDOM, right?
So even though I truly DO have more freedom than I had at the start of summer 2019, or even last year at this time, I still lacked the kind of freedom I am really after. I’m still feeling tied down. My desire for a long time has been to be location-independent. I’m not quite ready or willing to become a digital nomad and travel the globe. Again — my immune system right now. Ugh. I’m trying to build her up! But I decided I need to work towards the freedom #vanlife will provide.
What the F am I afraid of at this point?
I would gladly trade my current stressors for a new set that includes finding campgrounds and a place to shower. I don’t really camp, so I’d choose the RV over the van, to be honest. And this week, I am all about pulling back the veil and being honest! Ok, I always am. I tell it like it is, as my friends always say.
So today I’ve given thought to my choices. Do I sell it all or put it in storage? More likely some mix of both as I’ve been obsessed with minimalism for some time. I’d love to sell it all but I’m not ready! I still need my juicer! But I’m walking around my home today looking at all the “stuff,” like, “Well, this wouldn’t make it onto the RV for the trip…”
I realized today this dream is completely possible — but — it would take me a year or more to prepare. I’m also just nuts enough to make this happen. And I’m not sure what the first step is today. I have some ideas. I’ll explore this as the week begins. How can I do it? Do I break my lease? I’ve mentioned before I am in apartment hell with noisy neighbors and a first-time landlady who isn’t assertive about honoring what is in my lease and fixing the problem. There has got to be more to life than settling down, living under this popcorn ceiling, listening to my neighbor upstairs stomping around, and working so hard for the material things I’ve collected inside this home…